This post on Pregnancy Fears includes an advert from TENA.
My Pregnancy Fears
At the same time though, there are so many thoughts swimming around my mind all day and, annoyingly, a lot of the night.
I do remember feeling the ‘panic’ set in at around this time with my first pregnancy, I know it’s normal. That doesn’t turn it off though.
I thought I’d share some of my rational and, more likely, irrational pregnancy fears before the arrival of baby #2:
1. Will the baby come early?
Miss M was born 3 weeks early. A couple of weeks early would be fine – the baby would be perfectly ready to come then. But any earlier and argh. I am NOT prepared.
2. Will I be overdue?
I do not want to be overdue. Most people do not want to be overdue. I’m already bursting at the seams and complaining 24-7. Trust me, NO-ONE wants me to be overdue. But what if I am? I’m finishing work a week before my due date and I don’t want to waste my precious maternity leave sitting on my (expanding) bottom at home doing nothing
but eat biscuits.
3. Will I literally burst at the seams?
I don’t think there’s much ‘give’ left in there. It’s already feeling quite snug and let me tell you there is certainly no more room North (ribs) or South (pelvis) so unless this baby fancies dangling it’s head out for the next couple of months, I hope it doesn’t mind curling into a ball until it’s birthday.
4. Do I want a hospital or home birth?
I am still undecided. The hospital birth would be midwife led like last time but I love the idea of having the baby in the comfort of my own home. I keep trying to speak to my midwife about my home birth options but she won’t even engage in the conversation until I’m 34 weeks. Not particularly helpful. She’s a bit of a B to be honest.
5. Will I need stitches?
I did with my first birth but they were quick and pain free and I luckily had no issues afterwards. What about this time though? What if I end up with a 20lb baby? Will I make the global news? I digress.
6. Will my bladder hold up?
Mini loves to use my bladder as a punch bag. I’ve been told by a few ladies that if you’re not affected by bladder issues with the first pregnancy, the second one will ‘get you’. Mental note: remember to do kegel exercises! There’s a handy infographic at the bottom of the post to help you with these too.
7. Will I get stretchmarks?
I was lucky not to with my last pregnancy but since I spend 50% of my day now trying not to scratch my skin off, are they inevitable?
8. Will I be able to lose the baby weight?
How much of the weight gain is the baby and how much is biscuits? Will the biscuit weight gain come out with the baby? Please?
9. Will people still think I’m pregnant after?
Will I have a ‘bump’ forever? Will I actually have to diet and exercise? Will Spanx do the trick instead?
10. What if I can’t have a hypnobirth this time?
Although she was premature, Miss M’s birth was almost everything I wanted it to be – very peaceful, comfortable and calm. I have only recently started practicing my breathing exercises but I need to ramp this up pronto and get in the right state of mind to make it work. I’m certainly not opposed to drugs during labour but if possible, I’d like to have a drug-free one again.
11. How long can I afford to be off work on maternity leave?
I’d love a year. A lot of my friends had a year off. We can in no way afford a year so we’re going to try for 6 months. Unless we win the lottery.
12. Is the baby ok?
At least 10 times a day I wonder whether it’s ok – is it moving enough? Is it distressed? Can it hear me? I’m not going to be happy until it’s out and I can see for myself that it’s all ok and happy.
13. How will we get home from the hospital? We haven’t got a newborn car seat yet. I need to get this sorted this month.
14. Will my toddler like the new baby?
So far we’ve had a lot of ‘NO BABBY!’ when we’ve asked her if she’s excited to have a new sibling. Oh dear. We’ve resorted to every time we give her a new toy, item of clothing, anything, telling her it’s a present from the baby. The baby likes to gift yogurts especially but this seems to be going down well.
15. Will we be able to have a social life afterwards?
Will we get any couple time? Will we ever get to go out at night together again without one of us staying in with the kids? In the past two years after Miss M arrived, we have hardly had any nights out and only one together. Even then, Mr M came home early as we didn’t want to leave her with a babysitter for too long. We love socialising and we want to go out. To karaoke. We want to go to karaoke! Ok, I want to go to karaoke. Ok, I’ll go on my own.
16. What will be my first meal when I can eat what I want again?
Sushi? Brie? A runny egg? Ham? It’s a big decision! Note: it won’t be ham.
17. Will the new baby be another Daddy’s Girl/Boy?
Surely that can’t both choose their Daddy first? Someone is going to have to play with Mummy.
18. Will my feet return to their normal size post-pregnancy?
I’m not referring to water retention but the fact that during my last pregnancy they grew in size and a lot of my shoes no longer fit. Is that it now? Clown feet?
19. Is this really my last pregnancy?
I’ve only ever really wanted two children and that’s still all I want. What about afterwards though, what are my options to ensure there are no unexpected additions to the family?
20. Will I lose my hair post-pregnancy again?
I’m currently basking in the loveliness of thick, luscious locks but I do distinctly remember around the four month post-partum point last time my hair started falling out massively. Oh there’s just SO much to look forward to.
21. Will the acid reflux magically disappear after the baby arrives?
Oh I do hope so as first thing in the morning and last thing at night it’s pretty unbearable.
22. Will I be able to breastfeed?
I breastfed Miss M for seven months and I would be delighted to be able to do the same with Mini. It was a real struggle though for the first 2-3 months as I had a low supply. Will I be more relaxed this time? I hope so.
23. Is Mini a girl or a boy?
We’re still pretty convinced it’s a girl, as is my mum. My Dad thinks boy, just to be different.
24. What on Earth do you do with a baby boy?
I have very limited experience of boy babies. I am aware of their potential to pee on you during nappy changes. I know nothing else. I mean, it must be quite different to raising a little girl? Or is it? I have no “boy” things. I’d need to buy a whole new boy baby wardrobe. Argh.
25. Will the baby sleep well?
Or will it only nap for 20-40 minutes like Miss M did? I’ll be employing every last baby sleep tip I can remember!
26. Will I ever sleep again?
What with pregnancy discomfort and my usual insomnia issues, adding a sleepless newborn on top of that is not going to help much. I can’t remember the last time I got into bed, rolled over and slept ALL night. Perhaps I need white noise and a swaddle myself.
27. Will this horrible pelvic pain disappear after the baby arrives?
Oh I hope so.
28. Who will shave my legs for the next two months?
Yes, I’m at that point. I just can’t reach, it’s impossible. I’m going to have to ask my husband. Mortifying. And to be honest I’m not sure I trust him to do a good job!
29. When am I going to be able to drink again?
I haven’t had drop of alcohol for eight months and I’ll be honest, I do miss it. Nothing beats a (large) glass of red wine on a wintery evening. With breastfeeding it could literally be another 6-9 months before I can have a drink again! Ok, I’m sounding like a lush now, I’ll stop.
30. What if there are two in there?
There can’t be, can there? I certainly don’t feel like there are two and as big as I am, I’m not huge. But what if I end up being one of those random cases where one was hiding behind the other during the scans?
31. Where will I be when I go into labour?
At home? Work? Will I be near enough to home/hospital so I don’t end up giving birth in a taxi or my husband’s (filthy) car?
32. How long will labour last?
My labour was medically sped up with Miss M as I lost a lot of blood so it was only a few hours. What about this time though? A lot of women have much fast labours second time around. I mean, the baby might come in an hour! Or three days – oh I hate the unknown.
So they are my pregnancy fears! Well, just a couple of them.
Here is that advice from TENA I promised you:
Incontinence is more common than we think, affecting 1 in 3 women and 1 in 10 men within Australia. Here, TENA has created infographics to help simplify your understanding of incontinence and prepare yourself for it:
If you’re pregnant, what are/were your pregnancy fears?