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Part of it was trying to make the most of every day and part was in setting up my own business. I just did too much.
I’ve learned my lesson (I hope) and there are a few things I will be letting go of next year. My hope is to do less of the things that don’t serve a purpose or enrich our lives. That way, I will have more time, effort and energy to focus on the things that do count.
18 things to Stop Doing Next Year:
1. Saying Yes to too much
Last year I said Yes to too much – mainly work-wise. I agreed to projects and work that I loved to do but probably didn’t have the time for.
It’s so hard isn’t it though, to say No? I think it helps to have boundaries or rules about the things you will say Yes to.
Try to only say Yes to the things that serve a real purpose. Time and energy is finite and we can only do so much with both. Make it count.
This is a hard one. Fear clouded many of my thoughts last year. Fear of failure in making my business a success and fear of my cancer returning.
I can’t imagine a day where I won’t have some level of fear for both but I really want to spend more time this year focusing on what I have, not what might happen.
Fear is debilitating – it stops us from reaching our full potential and it certainly stops me from enjoying the moment I’m already in.
Try to spend more time thinking about, and talking about, the great things you already have in your life.
Stuff – so much stuff. Over the past couple of years I’ve slowly been reducing the amount of clutter we have in our home. It’s a work in progress but a project I will complete this year.
A home that is cluttered can create internal stresses as well as make living day to day more difficult than it needs to be. Marie Kondo, who wrote the Life Changing Magic of Tidying recommends going through your home in categories. Then holding every item you own in your hand and asking yourself if it “sparks joy”.
If it no longer does, discard it. Thank it for it’s memories and the service it has given you and let it go.
Want to do things the Marie Kondo way?
4. Online Clutter
It isn’t only the physical stuff that can weigh us down though – our online life can get overly cluttered too.
If your inbox is over-flowing, your smartphone busy with unused apps or your desktop in a mess, it’s time for a spring clean!
5. Anger Towards Others
I’ve learned over the years that forgiving someone isn’t a failure on my part, it’s a success.
When I forgive those who have hurt me, the weight lifts from my shoulders and I’m free from the anger I was holding on to. It doesn’t excuse that persons behaviour, it just detaches it from me. It’s liberating.
6. Anger Towards Yourself
Same – forgive yourself. Move on. You cannot change the past.
7. Rubbish friends
Along the same lines – I no longer fight to the death to keep friendships going that passed their prime.
There gets to a point in a relationship where you just have to call it. I used to feel that again, it was a big failure, for a friendship not to work out. I no longer do.
Using the techniques that I learned from the KonMari technique, I now feel positive when I walk away from a fake friendship. I can still look back at the happy memories and moments we shared but I can let go of pining for a time when it will be that good again. Because sometimes, it won’t be. Sometimes, friendships just run their course.
Most of us will claim to be a perfectionist to some extent. I mean, you don’t meet many people who will admit to the opposite! I’m no exception but the problem with being a perfectionist is that you often fail to complete things.
It’s that feeling that if it isn’t perfect, what’s the point. But how sad! I spent so much of the last couple of years holding on to ideas instead of just letting them fly. I wish I’d been more daring.
Let’s be more daring next year? Done is better than perfect. (Thank you Darren Rowse for sharing that gem with me).
9. Wasting Money
In my younger days I was frivolous with money and got into debt which took me ages to pay off. These days I’m much more careful but I still don’t keep an adequate hold on my spending.
In my efforts to declutter, I will stop bringing even more into the house.
One thing I do succeed at each year is saving money though. You can join me in saving $1378 super easily here by grabbing the Money Saving Challenge from my free Resource Library:
10. Lack of Sleep
I talk a lot about my insomnia but I’ll be honest, I just do not help myself.
For years I’ve struggled with getting to sleep and now I go to bed assuming it will be a bad night. It’s such negative thinking. I also stay up too late every night too and now often do not go to bed before 11pm or later. I’m setting myself up to fail. It needs to change.
Related: I Suffer from Insomnia Caused by Stress – and How I’m Managing It
11. Negativity About Yourself
I would never speak to friends the way I sometimes speak to myself – same for you?
I tell myself constantly that I’m not good enough, not slim enough, not capable enough to do something. The result – I don’t do them. I don’t succeed. The negativity I tell myself must stop.
I’ve learned the tough way lately that the people you are envious of often do not have the perfect life you think they do. There is no good to be gained from jealousy.
If you want something, go out and get it. Work for it. But don’t assume that someone else has it easier than you – you have no idea what they might be going through.
13. Mindless Social Media-ing
A tough one for those whose job (like mine), is online. Even so though, we’ve all been sucked into the rabbit hole of mindless Facebooking or Googling. Time to cut back.
14. Clothes That Will Never Fit
When you’re decluttering at home, an area you might need to be particularly ruthless with is your wardrobe. If you’re anything like me anyway.
I have brand new clothes hanging in my wardrobe, or stored away, that I brought ten years ago…for when I’ve lost weight. Thing is, I do intend to lose weight but there’s no way I’ll be rushing to wear any of these clothes when I do! The shape is all wrong after my two kids. They’re certainly not fashionable now, so many years on. Time to let go.
15. Trying To Do It All
Work-wise, I need help. I’ve been struggling to do so much myself with the fear of delegating. The result is that I’m shattered and my output is not as I would like it to be. I’m always rushed and too busy. This year, as well as saying No more, I will also learn to delegate. To enlist help.
Part of feeling over-worked, exhausted and busy is the overarching feeling of panic. There isn’t enough time. Time is running out. Panic. Panic!
I’m hopeful that by releasing some of the above, the sense of panic will subside too.
17. Ideas That Aren’t Working
There are some initiatives and projects I started in 2017 that, despite my good intentions, didn’t work out. They didn’t serve a purpose, they didn’t deliver, they wasted my time.
It’s great to test out new ideas, to try new things. But it’s also important to know when to draw a line under something and recognise that it’s time to stop.
18. Who You Used To Be
Reliving memories of the person you used to be is fine. But if you’re hanging on to the “old you” so much that it’s preventing you from living your life now, it’s time to change.
I’m so guilty of this. I think about the “pre-cancer Mim” a lot – how happy and carefree I was. How free and easy my days were. How my mind wasn’t clouded with dread and fear.
But if I’m honest, those days were just as imperfect as my life is now. I had different challenges then to now but they still existed. And, as a lovely blogging friend Denyse pointed out, that “old Mim” had cancer. So no need to long to be her again!
Embrace the person you are now – and work on any areas you want to improve. Live for the now, be present. Learn to love the new you.
I said in this post that I wasn’t setting any resolutions for this year. I think this list of 18 things to let go of next year is more about freeing myself up to enjoy life more.
What will you let go of next year?
Want to do things the Marie Kondo way?
- What to Do When New Year’s Resolutions Fail
- The Power of Positive Thinking
- How to Fake Being Happy…Until you Actually Are
- How to Overcome a Bad Day
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