4 Life Changing Events in 18 months is a guest post by Laura Powell-Corbett at Life with Baby Kicks
It’s said that some of the most stressful things you can do in life are to get married, to move house, have a baby or to deal with a loved ones death. In the space of 18 months all four things happened to our family, in quick succession.
4 Life Changing Events in 18 months
I’ve been with my husband since summer in 2008, but it hasn’t always been easy. After a tumultuous start to our relationship back in 2008, where we were on. Then we were off. And then on. Then off. Living together, moving out, breaking up, back together.
At the start of 2011 we finally headed to the bright lights of London to start afresh in a new city. Separately. For good this time.
It seems that sometimes that’s what you need. The age old adage of if you love someone set them free. We set each other free, and then we came back to one another. And this time it was for good. No melodramatics. None of the screeching arguments from before. Just him and me. And a cat called Bruno.
By the time 2011 was drawing to a close it felt like all was right with the world; our first Christmas spent together alone in our little corner of the world, boxing day with my parents, a holiday of a lifetime booked and paid for.
Working together in the same office we set off for Canary Wharf together in the interim period between Christmas and New Year that no one ever seems to want to work but we didn’t see the point in saving holidays for.
And life decided to show us that it doesn’t always stay on an even keel.
The first life changing event happened
My husband walking over to my desk at work to tell me his mum had been taken to hospital in Leeds and that he was on his way there now. Following him out of the office, leaving everything behind my only thoughts to be with him. Taking the tube in opposite direction to collect an overnight case from our flat.
No mobile signal on the tube.
Running into Kings Cross, frantically buying a ticket for the next train to London. Then looking down to see a missed call.
“They’ve said she isn’t going to make it”
A desperate need to be with him, to hold him. Willing the train to go faster, and faster again. Arriving in time. Holding him. Helping him.
A new decision made. Life is too short, let’s try for a baby.
Funerals arranged, understanding employers sending us off to Leeds together to sort out the flat. Leaning on each other, all thoughts of previous years of bickering and fighting far away.
Decisions made, the pill stopped, we boarded a plane to South America.
The second life changing event
Unknown to me, my (now) husband had asked my dad his permission to marry me over Christmas. Carrying along an engagement ring as we explored Argentina, he dropped to one knee the night before my birthday.
The next day a new decision made, baby plans put on hold until after a spectacular wedding. We continued on through Argentina, heading up to Brazil. Waterfalls, swimming at the Copacabana. Being together.
The third life changing event
The thing is, life doesn’t always go as planned. Returning home, to the cold February snow, things just didn’t feel right. A trip to ASDA, the buying of our weekly shop including one special thing.
A pregnancy test.
Two minutes. Leaving it doing it’s thing.
My fiancé heading up to check it, the most exaggerated OMG face I’ve ever seen. Thinking he was messing.
Our baby had plans to be at our wedding.
Our little secret. Phone calls to my mum and dad, sharing the joy of engagement, hugging the secret of a baby close to us.
The fourth life changing event
Two days later, a call at work from my mum’s home phone number. Never good. A sick feeling of dread.
“Laura, it’s your mum”
I know that, it’s been our phone number for the past twenty years.
“Your dad is dead”
“On the kitchen floor”
Another panicked trip from London, my fiance doing the job packing. Of following behind.
This time panicked messages, stay calm, think of the baby.
Panicked thoughts, why didn’t I tell him two days ago?
Arriving after he had been taken away. Taking control. Taking charge. Feeding everyone, registering deaths, funeral arrangements.
Leaning on my fiancé, always leaning.
Work giving me all the time I needed.
In the space of six weeks we had seen two deaths, one engagement and a pregnancy.
In the space of six weeks we grew closer than we ever were before, I was his rock, he was mine.
Over the coming months we would see an emergency, life saving, caesarean that had me on the table screaming to my dad to keep the baby safe.
We would see an emigration to the Middle East in Dubai.
A wedding planned, the date weeks after we moved to Dubai, all last minute arrangements hastily organised from Dubai.
Photo credit: Karina Cipikopf
Since then there’s been more changes, big and small.
The one constant we have is each other. He is my rock. I am his.
To go through everything together was either going to rip us apart, as fragile as we used to be, or bring us closer together. It did the latter.
Now I know I can conquer anything, as long as he is by my side.
I will leap into any adventure feet first, move to any country, head on any holiday, knowing that we have each other.
And if things get tough where we are living then, as it is now in Qatar, then I know we will get through it.
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