TPP #69 – How To BE Who You Want In 2024

Welcome to Episode #69 of The Planner Podcast.

Inspiration hit me after listening to an awesome podcast I listened to from Dr Hayley Kelly – link below. I realised that I haven’t “been myself” lately.

But I also haven’t been BEing who I actually want to BE.

And while I have a few more months left of 2023, now seems like a great time to start BEing different. So that in 2024, I can start the year with who I want to be. I hope this episode helps you to do the same.

Get ready to make 2024 the year you start to BE who you want!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Got questions? DM me @paperplannerclub
• The Therapist Rising Podcast

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Transcript

Hi, this is Mim Jenkinson and you’re listening to The Planner Podcast.

Hi love and welcome back. First of all, I am recording this podcast on my phone while I’m getting ready in the morning and doing my hair. And I know that that isn’t like 100 percent professional, you wouldn’t expect it from like some of these huge podcasters with huge audiences, but this is the way I’m doing this today.

And the reason why is because I’ve just been listening to a podcast myself. It really sparked something huge in me that I wanted to share with you because I think it’s going to really spark something in you too. And I thought, you know, I could wait until I, am at my desk. I’ve got my professional mic and set up.

I could wait until I’ve got my camera turned on and I could turn this into a video as well. Can you hear me actually brushing my hair right now? I could wait until I’ve made a few bullet notes on the sticky notes so I’m, you know, I cover exactly what I want to get across to you. Or, and this is, this is partially the subject of today’s podcast, or I could just get it done.

And so I’ve decided to do that, so, thanks for bearing with me. If the, recording is a little, up and down, volume wise, or, you know, if it isn’t perfectly polished, I know you’ll forgive me, because, that’s who you are, and you’re lovely. So, let’s keep on, let’s keep going. So, the podcast I was listening to was from, from Bai, sorry, not from, Bai, one of my amazing, Friends who’s like went from being a business like contact to a business bestie to a really, really good friend now, really good friend, and she’s called Hayley Kelly.

Dr. Hayley Kelly, she runs the Therapists Rising Business, and her podcast is called Therapists Rising Too. So while I’m not a therapist, she supports therapists and psychologists and health professionals start their own online business. And while I am not, in that category in any way, I always listen to Hailey because one, I love her, and two, she’s just so very wise.

So very wise. And so I’ve been listening to a podcast and I’ll link it in the show notes. It’s a, can you hear me turn the lights off? It’s a, an interview with Natalie McNeil is amazing. Anyway, one thing that they were just talking about made me think, Oh, I’ve got to share this. They were talking about who you choose to be.

So when I say BE, like your identity, who you want to be, how you want to feel about the person that you are. And it made me think, who do I want to be in 2024? Who do I want to be next year? Who am I being right now? And it brought up quite a lot for me. And one thing that Hayley was saying is, you know, we don’t always get to choose who we are, how we’re being, especially in the early years where we are.

Absolutely influenced by, people in our lives, maybe it’s our parents, guardians, grandparents, teachers, older siblings, other friends, you know, we don’t always have a conscious choice or any choice whatsoever on who we become. But of course we can change who we are at any point too. And it got me thinking, who am I being right now?

And who do I want to be in 2024? And of course, when New Year comes around, there’ll be a lot of talk online, offline, in conversations about, even in our own minds, about what we want next year to be like, what we want to achieve, what we, have on our goals list, what we don’t want to do anymore, all of those things.

And of course, January the 1st is a perfect time to make those changes. But what if we start to make some of those changes now? What if we look at the rest of this year? And it’s actually the first week in October as I’m recording this. What if we look at the rest of this year as like a practice run? I’m definitely going to start to do that.

And I wonder whether that’s something that you might do too. So when I think about who I’m being right now, and the things that I want to do differently next year with who I am and, and the person that I become. There are definitely things that have shown up for me this year that I want to start letting go of, and going back to what I was mentioning at the start of this podcast, perfectionism is one of those things.

I do not want to be a perfectionist, and for a long time I was, one for sure in my life, I’ve always had that tendency, but then for many, I really did work on this for a number of years, and for a long time I would have said that I was not a perfectionist, like perfectionism was part of who I was being.

And I’d worked really hard to do that. And I wouldn’t even call myself a recovering perfectionist. Like I was recovered as far as I was concerned. But what I hadn’t realized was that I wasn’t fully recovered. And also perfectionism had started to show up in less obvious ways. So it wasn’t just about, you know, completing a piece of work and having it look perfect or be perfect or checking off all of the boxes.

It was things like, well, I’m not even going to start to do that thing unless I’ve got All of the docs lined up in a row first. So, you know, you, I wouldn’t have recorded a podcast episode unless I was at my desk, like I say, with, with a few notes and, with my professional mic and so on. And I don’t want to do that anymore.

Like, I don’t, I don’t want to keep on putting things off because everything isn’t perfect. It’s letting myself down. It’s letting other people down, and it isn’t a part of my, the part of my identity that I want anymore. And don’t get me wrong, it isn’t that I plan to record every podcast. like this like definitely not.

So what I’ve started to do is just look at the ways that I am letting perfectionism take over and that’s just one example of how I do not want to be anymore in 2024. So I’m going to use the next few months as a way to be able to work on that. And to work on really identifying when perfectionism is showing up and how I can be different.

So one of the things I would do is, you know, first of all, identify, okay, this is me being a perfectionist again. What is that stopping me or what is that preventing me from achieving right now? And what’s more important to me? Is it having everything lined up and being perfect, or is it actually the output?

Maybe it’s that recording and publishing the podcast episode again, as that example. So that’s something that I want to do differently. I’ve also found, and I have had a heavy year in many ways, as many of you know, my brother passed away at the beginning of the year. It’s been an incredibly difficult year in so, so many ways personally.

And, um. I have become, in many ways, a different version of myself, again, without even realising, certainly without consciously realising. And I, have, I’ve found myself, and I’m still very much in, in grief, and I, you know, always will be, but I’ve found myself being, more internal than I wanted to be when it came to some of the feelings that I’ve been going through.

And I, whilst I don’t want to overshare absolutely everything that I’m experiencing, At the times when I have realized that when I have shared, I’ve received the support that I truly needed, I have absolutely felt so much better. So again, it’s something else that I really want to do. I want to really nurture the relationships and the friendships that I have.

And I want to be more available to others for them and for myself too, because I found that the more available I become, the more open I am. To sharing about what I’m going through and the more open I am to asking for support and asking for help The more I receive and the more that I then not just feel differently and experience much more happiness in my life but also The way that it nurtures a relationship on a whole new level with my the friends and the family in my life who are offering That help is a great thing for me and for them too And I found that shutting myself off only has worked So far.

So I want to be more open. I want to be more, open to sharing and to asking for help. So they’re just a couple of examples and, you know, there’s other things that I want to be too. I might create a. Who will I be in 2024 list? Perhaps that’s something that we could do together. Let me know. But there are other things I want to be.

I absolutely want to be more grateful. I want to, experience the joy of feeling gratitude for everything, everyone, all of the things that I have in my life, because I’m, I’m so very grateful. And I found that at the times where I have, not made gratitude and an intention that I set every single day.

I lose the benefits of that too. So I could, I could literally list all of the different things that I want to do differently to be different in 2024. But I’d love to hear from you. Has any of this sparked any ideas for you on how you’re being now? How you’re being now and how you want to be in 2024. Let me know.

So you can always reach out to me on Instagram at paper planner club. I would love to know whether you could have a list or even just one main trait or one main part of your identity that you want to do differently to be different in 2024. And are you with me? Should we make the rest of this year a practice run on how we can.

Start to let go of who we do not want to be anymore and start to embrace who we do want to be. I hope that this episode has sparked something in you. Thank you so much for listening and I will connect with you soon.

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